The Heartbreaking Choices We Make

There are a great deal of painful decitions that we must make in life and they never seem to get any easier. One of those decitions is telling your child that it's time to leave. I informed Brian of this decition this morning. I can still feel the anger radiating from him after being woke up and told that he needed to find another place to live. Maintaining my composure during the insults and accusations comming from my son had me on the verge of tears. The problem is, my son is almost twenty years old and still wants to act like a young teen. He also has ADD. Mentally he is behind other kids his age but we have talked to him till we are blue in the face. Trying to reason with a young angry adult is never an easy task. Since he graduated we only ask what we felt were a few simple request from him.
1. Stay out of trouble-and he has done this.
2. If you need to borow something, be sure to ask or leave it alone.- Not so good at
3. Help out around the house-as with most young adults this only works out when they are around and you have to specificly point out what you want help with
4.Don't be out all week and call home-been having a lot of trouble with this

Number 4 is the reason that I told him it was time to grow up and time to leave. I have a house full of teens so some sense of order must be maintained in my home. I worry about my kids and I can't have them showing up at 2 in the morning after they have decided to be out all week. Graduating from high school doesn't mean you can do what you want from now on. It only means more responsibility.

What I told Brian was that he had to leave for now because he was warned the last time it happened. I also informed him that he could stop by later after Kirk gets off work to talk it over with his dad. I hope he remembers and takes my advice but I may have to wear the unfortunate title as Bitch for a while. I can still hear the accusations rolling around in my head.
"You wouldn't do this to any of your own kids I bet."
"I'll probibly be dead in a year."
"I take out your **** dog for you."
"I help out in your **** house."
"You wouldn't do this to Ed"
         "So why don't you try to give the service a shot?"
"I don't like to fight, I don't want to get sent to war"
          "So why are you fighting with me?"
"This is all Kristen's falt"
           "Kristen has nothing to do with this. Your dad and I warned you the last time you the last time it happened."
"I want my cap and gown from graduation!"
           "When you find a place to stay I'll give it to you"
"I have no where to go"

But he left and no I'm not happy about it either. I love all my kids even if I didn't give birth to one of them they are still my kids and I worry about them. If you see Brian, tell him that we are still willing to listen if he is willing to listen. We want to be able to help him find a job and some meaning in life. This was NOT a get out and never come back. I wonder if part of him wanted to go. But at least for now I think he needs a little time away, at least to collect his thoughts.